The HourGlass

Sometimes we find ourselves struggling with something awkward. We may think it is something outside ourselves, and yet when looking consciously, we can always find how we put ourselves through a lot of stress simply by the perspective we take towards what happens in our lives.

Nevertheless, we surely are Going Through Hell sometimes. And some of you might have the experience that I have: the Hell I cook for myself is mostly the hottest one. Yet I have to go through it anyway. That is the sure way out, in my experience.

Temperature in Hell can rise above 1000°C and still you won’t stop raising the temperature, adding thoughts and pains that raise your feeling of ‘how can I ever get through this?’.

Looking back on processes in which I went through a phase like that, I realize that each and every time there has been a turning point, where all of the sudden things just flip to the other side. As if raising the temperature, raising the pressure was necessary to be ready to fully allow that ‘sudden’ change. Moreover I discovered that often the ‘sudden’ change proved to be the end of the High Pressure Period, while in the mean time I had already started building something new, something that fitted me better than what was before.

In short I call that process Transformation.

Now it helps to accept the High Pressure High Temperature Periods when I have an image that supports me, an image that helps to believe that indeed, when going through hell, the best option is to keep going. An image that helps me trust what emerges, because that trust enables me to handle whatever it is that emerges.

The HourGlass is such an image. Find yourself an HourGlass somewhere. I borrowed one from a game I have. Put it on your table and look. Look how the sand inside first seems to fall slowly, than faster and faster. Looking at the upper part of the HourGlass, you have the impression that the sand is gathering close to the bottle neck, maybe even gets squeezed to pass through it, faster and faster and faster. And then all of the sudden the last grain pops through the bottle neck, and you realize that all the time the process happening in the upper part of the HourGlass, that drew most of your attention, was simultaneously creating a new pile of sand in the lower part of the HourGlass.

I know, Life has a way of turning that HourGlass upside down again, and pushing our sand grains through the whole process again. I sometimes curse that, sometimes wish I had no process to go through for a day, or a week. On the other hand, each and every time the HourGlass made my sand grains travel, each and every time I went through a Transformation, I became more of the person I am today. And I’m grateful for that. It gives me trust in what emerges, and helps me handle High Pressure Periods.

Next time you feel like something is squeezing you towards unknown depths, through a bottle neck, find yourself an HourGlass, maybe it will help you too to trust the process.

In La’kech,

A.N.

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